Episode 77.0 (because Falcon can't count). I Like Muffins | November 8, 2008 at 12:37 a.m.

 1.         Nov 8, 2008, 12:37 AM

2.         I like muffins!

3.         Current mood: bitchy

 

4.   SERLEINA

MOOD: WOOF!

 

5.   CINNAMON

Yeah, so much for the sophisticated vibe I had going right?

 

6.   EVRYN

Errrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrmmmmmmmmmmm... Look, I don't wanna hurt your feelings and get a lifetime banhammer from your galaxy, but...

 

7.   CIN

a)  Actually, it really hasn't BEEN that sophisticated, but I'd like to think of myself that way anyway.

b)  I'm probably supposed to be using this time to study, but I prefer to spend it gracing the stage with my presence. Kehehehe.

c)   Let's see now, here's the part where I get to gripe at everyone, right?

d)  Bas— nothing to gripe about (for once, right?). You've been awesome, like the ONE normalcy in my life.

 

8.   EVRYN

Damn, put a fucking cross on the ceiling. It's a bloody miracle.

 

9.   SERLEINA

That's what I said when I found someone Sigyn wasn't attracted to!

 

10.                  EVRYN

Wasn't that Jesus?

 

11.                  SERLEINA

No, that's just the Twilight fanfiction.

 

12.                  CIN

'Sagi, you sexy bitch, I get to gripe at you for being strictly eye-candy for us girls.

 

13.                  EVRYN

Friendly reminder to not shame the homo-homo for being homo-homo, please and thank you.

 

14.                  LENA

Why do you keep stepping on my lines?

 

15.                  CINNAMON

Lee— FOR THE LOVE OF HEIMDALL, TALK TO HER ALREADY!!!! It may be obvious to YOU that you still love her, but it's not so obvious to the rest of us.

 

16.                  EVRYN

Except, evidently, you.

 

17.                  SERLEINA

Didn't he bang her last night? How is there any ambiguity about his feelings for Akuma?

 

18.                  MARIE

Yeah, they were doing the "I love you so much, smooch smooch" thing and promising they'd never doubt each other again.

 

19.                  TOKIOMI

... Well, shit. Epiphany, do you take check?

 

20.                  EVRYN

ACTUALLY, I started the betting pool. ... but I was going to give my winnings to Epiphany anyway, so proceed.

 

21.                  EPIPHANY

[Sure, as long as it doesn't bounce.]

 

22.                  TOKIOMI

... Let me check my account.

 

23.                  CINNAMON

Bliu— Gripe gripety gripe gripe gripe for ignoring my emails n' stuff, not like I really had anything to say but I'm bitchy like that.

 

24.                  SERLEINA

ARF!

 

25.                  CIN

People of California— YOU SUCK! Seriously! I'm so glad I left because no way do I want to live in a state where THE PEOPLE actually vote to BAN gay marriage!

 

26.                  EVRYN

Wouldn't it be worse in Arizona, since Arizona's a red state?

 

27.                  CIN

a)  And, uh, everyone else— Jeez, stop being so down on yourselves.

b)  I'm just a walking paradox, aren't I?

 

28.                  SEI-SEI

You have forgotten that I, the Totetsu, have EATEN THE CONSISTENCY!

 

29.                  —

 

30.                  CREVAN

If you own a cat... MAKE FUCKING SURE THEY HAVE FOOD AND WATER BEFORE YOU SLEEP!!! OTHERWISE, THEY'LL DO EVERYTHING IN THEIR POWER TO FUCKING WAKE YOU!!! Chloe woke me up from 2 AM to 8 AM randomly... and all because she didn't have water... so now I have to pick up everything she knocked down...

 

31.                  CINNAMON

Or, you know, feed and water them because they're living beings who deserve food and water, not because it would be convenient to you...

 

32.                  CREVAN

I always have made sure of that! But last night I was too tired to actually put water in her bowl. I even left out a burger on accident! I just worked way too hard and forgot her water... But you are right. She's a living being that deserves to not be treated as an inconvenience.

 

33.                  MARIE

Welp. You fucked up. Apologize to your cat and don't do it again.

 

34.                  RIKI AKE

Oh sure, just jump to conclusions before you know the full situation. It must be easy to be such a bitch like you.

 

35.                  SERLEINA

BORK! YES, IT IS! THANK YOU FOR ASKING! ALTHOUGH I'M NOT SURE HOW RELEVANT THAT IS TO THE SITUATION!

 

36.                  CINNAMON

Ah, well, Crev, I figured it might be something like that, but you just never know, y'know? Gotta make sure and all that.

 

37.                  RIKI

Ignoring me means you've won! But go ahead and keep being insufferably bitchy.

 

38.                  SERLEINA

YIP YAP! 

 

39.                  CINNAMON

Nah, I wasn't ignoring you. I just didn't really have anything to say. You're fine, though, I'm not offended by your words. Actually, I'm glad you're being such a good friend to him. But hey, I mean, I'm sure if he was bothered by what I said, he'd let me know, right?

 

40.                  RIKI

Keep being a bitch, though. 

 

41.                  SERLEINA

AWOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

 

42.                  RIKI

I'm sure in your head you're not hurting anyone.

 

43.                  CINNAMON

Shit, was he hurt by what I said? I better apologize. Thanks for the heads-up!

 

44.                  RIKI

Heads up? I stood up for my friend, pointed out you were being a bitch, and you were even more bitchy about it.

 

45.                  SERLEINA

DOG NOISES! TIMES TWO! I'm not really running out. I just wanted to point out how stale and repetitive Riki's dialogue is.

 

46.                  RIKI

I'm going to stand up for my friend. You really need to look at yourself the way you've talked him down, and tried to do the same for me for pointing out you were rude to him.

 

47.                  MARIE

I would like to make a comment, but I don't comprehend why you're so needlessly confrontational right now.

 

48.                  VAAN

VERHAPS SHE HAS BORROWED THE BASEBALL BAT FROM "LUCKY" AND IS USING IT AS A BUTT PLUG!

 

49.                  MARIE

Let's never speak of that again, Vaan.

 

50.                  VAAN

Vey, at least I'm not the vone with a giant stick up my ass.

 

51.                  AHRRY

HEE-HAW, HEE-HAW, I'M NOT LISTENING, HEE-HAW! AND I HOPE SERLEINA'S NOT HARDCORE ENOUGH TO TRY TO PLAY FETCH WITH—

 

52.                  SERLEINA

I'M GOING TO STOP YOU RIGHT THE FUCK THERE.

 

53.                  CINNAMON

Well, I'm glad for him that you're such a good friend to him. I will apologize since you've pointed it out to me, and hopefully he and I can go from there.

 

54.                  RIKI

A lot of people here have a hard time talking for themselves.

 

55.                  REIYA

That sounds like a PERSONAL PROBLEM. I don't recall Crevan requesting interpreter services, anyhow.

 

56.                  MARIE

I'd have a hard time talking for myself too if I hung around someone who likes to jump down people's throats for very little apparent reason.

 

57.                  RIKI

If you knew him the way you said you did, you would know he's one of those people. 

 

58.                  REIYA

And I think you need to pop yo titty out his mouth and let the boy grow up.

 

59.                  SERLEINA

AMEN!

 

60.                  RIKI

Listen when people point out you're being mean, half the time they're standing up for someone. 

 

61.                  EVRYN

She listened, though. She thanked you and said she would apologise.

 

62.                  VAAN

Vat stick up ve ass does some strange vings to people's personalities, let me tell you.

 

63.                  EVRYN

That's no excuse! That's just something we made up for this episode! She wasn't literally using a baseball bat as a butt plug when this conversation initially happened!

 

64.                  MARIE

"Oh, I'm being an aggressive asshole towards you in defense of someone else!" is an awfully convenient excuse.

 

65.                  RIKI

I don't really care if this is preachy, but I'm not trying to beat you down or some shit, just trying to make sure you understand when you're so against hurting someone, don't talk shit when someone is clearly standing up for them.

 

66.                  SERLEINA

SHOW ME IN THE TEXT WHERE SHE WAS TALKING SHIT ABOUT YOU STANDING UP FOR YOUR FRIEND.

 

67.                  CINNAMON

It also seems as though you're determined to be antagonistic towards me no matter what, and that's fine. As I said, you don't offend me. I would just like to solve the heart of the problem here.

 

68.                  RIKI

I wasn't trying to offend you, I was trying to point out what you said was bitchy. And bitchy things hurt people.

 

69.                  SERLEINA

MORE DOG NOISES TIMES TWO! AGAIN!

 

70.                  MARIE

Has it ever occurred to you that perhaps calling people that word is, in fact, a way of hurting people?

 

71.                  SERLEINA

It doesn't hurt me, but I'm literally a werewolf, so it's accurate. But I can see how MANY WOMEN could find it DEHUMANIZING. HINT THE FUCK HINT.

 

72.                  CINNAMON

Okay, I hear you. And I understand that you're protective of Crevan, and as I said before, that is a good thing. He is a more sensitive person than I am, so I am genuinely grateful that you pointed out to me that what I said was insensitive.

 

73.                  RIKI

But now that I stood up for him, I legit could not care less about you, so bye.

 

74.      [/ragequit RIKI]

 

75.                  CINNAMON

Bless your heart, sweet pea. You take care now.

 

76.                  RIKI, offstage

LA LA LA, I CAN'T HEAR YOU!

 

77.                  EVRYN

Epi, could I borrow your scalpel?

 

78.                  EPIPHANY

[Sure.]

 

79.                  EVRYN

Awesome, it's time to correct her parents' error! See ya!

 

80.      [stagequit Evryn]

 

81.                  OVD

Evryn —

... Oh, fuck it.