Episode 62. At Least She Has Imaginary Friends, part 1 | November 6, 2008 at 8:22 a.m.

 1.       TITLE

At Least She Has Imaginary Friends, part 1

 

2.       6 Nov 08, 8.22 AM

 

3.                  ORION

I might be a bit late tonight.

 

4.                  ROSEMARY

No, I'm a human. Do you want to be a human?

 

5.                  CINNAMON

Why would ANYONE want to be a human? Humans suck.

 

6.                  EPIPHANY

[Excuse you, my parents and I were human, and so are my aunt and uncle and my cousins and my Nene and, you know, my entire family.]

 

7.                  CINNAMON

Well, there are exceptions. #NotAllHumans.

 

8.                  OVD

That... no, that's terrible. You can't say that. You can't say ANY of that.

 

9.                  EPIPHANY

[Did you just "You Are A Credit To Your Race" me?]

 

10.             CINNAMON

No. Technically I just "long trope name"-d your dead parents, and your third-degree relatives, and your entire family.

 

11.             OVD

Just stop.

 

12.             ORION

Forgive me, but my host I mean, Drake wants me to help him put up three memorial stones on the beach.

 

13.             EPIPHANY

[That seems to be a bad place to put anything you want to stay there.]

 

14.             SIGYN

Excuse you, I'm from the beach

 

15.             EPIPHANY

[And are you on the beach now?]

 

16.             SIGYN

I would be if I didn't have to watch this stupid show. #ShotsFired.

 

17.             OVD

I'm almost too frustrated with all of you to even point out the anachronisms any—

 

18.             SERLEINA

#ANACHRONISMS!

 

19.             EVRYN

Oh, come on, we all know you love this show.

 

20.             SIGYN

I would sell every single one of your souls for a single Ritz cracker.

 

21.             EPIPHANY, grinning

[GOOD LUCK FINDING MINE]

 

22.             SIGYN

Again, there are exceptions.

 

23.             EPIPHANY

[You just said, "Every single one of you."]

 

24.             SIGYN

Every single one of you, with exceptions!

 

25.             EPIPHANY

[But "every single one of you" denotes a lack of exceptions.]

 

26.             SIGYN

Are you STILL trying to point out logical errors on this show?

 

27.             EPIPHANY

[No.]

[Right now, I happen to be pointing them out from the Audience.]

 

28.             EPIPHANY, =P

[So there.]

 

29.             ORION

One for each of the girls and another for… someone that was dear to him that he lost.

 

30.             EPIPHANY

[Gratuitous vagueness!]

 

31.             ORION

But I will be there. I have someone who will be waiting for you, though, if possible.

 

32.             ROSEMARY

I don't want to meet you either. I want to devour the soul of all of humanity.

 

33.             SERLEINA

NOW THAT’S MY KIND OF GAL!

 

34.             EVRYN

Oh gods. Even now, I wonder what was going through your head when you hired Serleina?

 

35.             OVD

...She threatened to sacrifice me to Averna if I didn't.

 

36.             SIGYN

She VOLUNTEERED for this?!

 

37.             SERLEINA

You didn't think I was going to let my half-brother be a star without me, did you? Besides, as I recall, so did YOU.

 

38.             SIGYN

Um, no.

 

39.             SERLEINA

UMMMM, YES. You saw the name Falcon and jumped into the seat.

 

40.             SIGYN

Nooo, as you recall, I was approached for— oh, forget it.

 

41.             ORION

However, she is not… She is a pet—

 

42.             EPIPHANY zaps Orion

 

43.             ORION

—that looks only to please in any way so be careful of what you say.

 

44.             EPIPHANY

[How about YOU be careful what YOU say before I get ANNOYED by your existence?]

 

45.             ORION

Be safe.

 

46.             ILLYBRIUS

Thank you for telling me. I will be here until sometime after midnight.